Goin' Camping!

Hey!
I'm just about packed and ready to head out to Fairbank campground. There's four youth leaders taking two senior high youth camping for the night. This might sound like an odd ratio, but last year's youth camping trip had three leaders and NO youth! So things are really looking up this year! hehe!

The last couple days have been filled with talk and prep for the trip. Who knew an overnight trip could be so crazy to plan and organize. Steve had the spots reserved early in the month, so that's great...but Matthew and I have been shopping for sleeping pads and he needed a sleeping bag...(he found a really cool one that's got two bags in one). We've unrolled and rolled our beds out a few times to get them used to sucking in air and expand to their full capacity...it will be nice to actually unroll them and get to use them!

I've just finished packing up all kinds of snacks and drinks and stuff I've had lying around here a bit...and after our stop at the Bulk Barn last night, we won't be lacking in the snack department! I hope Steve and Leah buy some 'real' food! All I know is that we are in for a pancake breakfast in the morning...the rest of the meals are a surprise. Hotdogs on the campfire tonight would be fun, and then I can show 'em how to make REAL hot DOGS. lol!

Well, I better get everything into the car. Mom and I are heading to Matthew's place for lunch with his parents before we leave them to chat without us around and we head up to the church to meet up with Steve and Leah and the youth, Dylan and Laura. (It's a little weird to know our moms are starting to chat on the phone together and plan luncheons). But it's totally awesome too...they are alot alike and will be fast friends we are sure!

Matthew, less then one hour before you are free from work and I'll see you at your place!
Here's hoping we have a fabulously fun and safe weekend!

Waiting On God?

My mind is full...ya, even more than usual. Life is full, with summer over, organizing my fall schedule takes over; planning and waiting for things to start. The coming busyness scares me. Yet I can't wait to settle into a routine. School starts in eight days; is that good or bad? Will I have a car to get myself to school? Too many thoughts running way too fast to type...

Once again Matthew and I had a serious conversation yesterday, centered around the progression of our relationship. I'm frustrated, and he is waiting. He doesn't know what he's waiting for. This frustrates us both. He is waiting on God. Who am I waiting on? I've been waiting on Matthew. This is so wrong; I need to change my focus, but how?

This summer, I read the first book of the New Testament, the book of Matthew. (haha...not on purpose, just starting my own journey through the NT). I was actually surprised by how many of the tales I was familiar with, but I wanted to read it because I had never read through it myself. The end of the book was surprising, I didn't realize how much Jesus focused on preaching about his second coming, and how that should be our primary focus, our deepest desire in life; to reunite with Him.

Lately, my deepest desire is to be close to Matthew. To share every possible moment we can. Have I put God on the backburner? I know we focus on keeping God as the "glue" in our relationship; we pray together daily. There is no doubt that we both want and need God in the center of our relationship. What have I personally done to bring God closer to us? I don't know. Am I letting us down? Am I letting Matthew down? Most importantly, am I letting God down?

Am I setting a good, godly example for others? What would others say if they knew my heart? Here I am about to take on leadership of the Jr High Bible Study...am I ready for that? I so want to be; I feel like it's something God is asking me to try. Is it possible to never disappoint God? Do I really understand that nothing I do will make Him love me more, or make Him love me less? That is an amazing promise!!! ...Is it something that can be easily manipulated?, or taken advantage of? How have I honoured God lately?

The desire to share my life with someone (Matthew...hehe), the need for a companion, a soulmate, a life partner, is so strong...shouldn't I desire God's closeness a whole lot more??? Shouldn't I be ready and waiting for Christ's return, and not longing that I get to experience marriage and motherhood first? How do I alter my heart's desires, if I should?

How do I remove the pressure I place on Matthew; and place my trust in God? I am confident in our future together, and for that I am so greatful. God has surpassed both of our wildest dreams in the partner He's brought us. Will God not do the same throughout our relationship; in His perfect timing, surprise us beyong our wildest hopes?!?! What an amazing God we have...a Father who delights in giving us the things we desire.

God, please help my heart refocus and delight in You! Help me be patient in waiting to join my life with Matthew. Help me to want the things you have set aside for me on this day and each day that follows. Help me to bring my impatience to You, and not pressure those around me.
I love you, God...and want to show you my love through my words and my actions. Help me to do that. Help me to wait on You.
Amen

Haven't Forgotten

It's been soooooooooooo long since I updated my blog; I know, I know! I haven't forgotten about it, I've just been busy, and had very limited internet access this summer.
I'm back home now, and plan to update my blog with happenings from my summer.
Stay Tuned...