Christmas Day!

This has got to be one of the strangest Christmas days I have ever had.

We were informed back in November that my Mom was going out of town to spend Christmas with my brother and his kids.  Then not even a week later, my Dad tells me he is going out of town to spend Christmas with his fiancee's daughters.  At first I was sad that I would not see either of my parents on Christmas day, but then it would make it a more relaxed day to just spend with the in-laws and not have to fit in three Christmas celebrations in one day.  But that's wasn't going to work out either...

Go figure, all month I was so worried about us getting sick and having to miss out on Christmas Day with the in-laws.  We stayed healthy, but...they got sick!  That's right, came down with the flu four days before Christmas.  It stuck around for a while, so our Christmas day plans were cancelled (or re-scheduled for later in the week).  But now...what were we to do on Christmas day?

Our church does a Christmas morning service geared to kids, (we don't usually attend - maybe because we haven't had kids til now).  But since we had no other plans we decided to go.  It was very nice to see friends and focus on the real reason for Christmas, the birth of Jesus Christ.  They had entertaining little video clips and cupcakes for the kids after they sang Happy Birthday to Jesus.  It was really cute.  After some hellos and well wishes to friends, we headed home for lunch and a nap.  In the afternoon we opened gifts from Grandma and our gifts to Benjamin.  Then we went to visit my hubby's Uncle Vic and Aunt Faith who haven't seen Benjamin since he was only about 4 or 5 months old.  It was a very nice visit and we headed home for a quiet supper of leftover turkey.

It was an odd Christmas day, but a good one.

Christmas Eve

Today we had a quiet day at home, just the three of us.  Daddy went shopping in the morning and came home with a turkey (since Christmas day dinner at his parents was cancelled because they are sick).  So he cooked his first turkey today.  It was great!  (...cooked from frozen and pre-stuffed, but it was still awesome!)

We watched the Charlie Brown Christmas with Benjamin.  He really enjoys the music of TV shows; he ignores the TV until the music catches his attention.

Another Recommended Documentary: Pregnant in America

I just finished watching Pregnant in America, Produced by Steve & Mandy Buonaugurio.  Wow, I highly recommend this documentary to anyone who is thinking of pregnancy, is pregnant or has ever been pregnant, or knows someone in any of these circumstances.  It's definitely an enlightening film, even if you don't live in US.

www.pregnantinamerica.com

This has encouraged me to do some digging into birthing statistics in Canada.  Check out my Statistics page.

And He's Off...

Benjamin's walking!!!  It didn't take him long to figure it out once he took his first steps.  Within a week he was pretty confident moving around on his own two feet!  He rarely crawls now (except at church, which we can't figure out?).

I wonder how long it will be before I'm chasing him while he is running away from me?

Another Antibiotic!

So ya, I took an antibiotic on Dec. 3rd for a sinus infection.  It was a one-time dose medication that was supposed to stay in my body for 10 days to fight the infection.  Two weeks later, the symptoms came back!  This time I got into my family doctor's office and was prescribed Amoxicillin: 500mg 3 times a day for 10 days.  Here's hoping this works!

PS.  I am still on Fluconazole, 200mg/day for yeast; so my body is being hit from both sides (bacterial and fungal).  Usually taking an antibiotic will cause a yeast overgrowth, but because I am on the Fluconazole, I should be fine.  I'll keep my fingers crossed!

Sleep Transitioning Update

We have been working on this again.  For the last week or so I have been nursing Benjamin in my bed and sliding him over onto his crib mattress to sleep.  When he wakes in the night, I bring him back onto my bed, nurse and slide him back over onto his crib mattress. 

The first few nights were tough.  The move rouses him and he was not impressed to be moved away from beside me, so he was awake and up and moving around his crib for almost an hour.  Over time he got tired enough to snuggle down and fall asleep, usually half on his crib mattress and half draped over me in my bed.  He would slowly reposition himself onto his own mattress and put himself to sleep. 

After a few nights of moving him onto his crib mattress after he was done nursing, he finally started to stay relaxed and would just roll onto his tummy, stick his butt in the air and fall asleep.

Perhaps in a few days, we'll put the safety bed rails back up on my bed and start having to lift him into the crib.

IT is back...after over a year

Yup, IT started up again today after about 21 months without it! 
Hoohum...

First Steps

On Friday, when we picked up Benjamin from daycare, Cora opened the door with a huge smile on her face and exclaimed that Benjamin took his first steps!  When we had to sign him up for daycare, I thought it might really affect me that I could miss this kind of milestone...but it's ok, I'm ok; because Cora was there and was so excited for him and for us.

Saturday morning, Benjamin took a few steps that we got to see, then again at our Mom's Moments group that morning.  We visited Deda and Carole that afternoon and he took a few steps for them too.

We called the other grandparents to let them know.  Everyone's excited! 
Way to go, Mister!

Taking Antibiotic & Antifungal

Yes, I have started an antibiotic to fight off a sinus infection; all while I am still taking Fluconazole to battle my thrush/candida infection.  I was told the drugs would do their separate jobs, but by killing off all the bacteria (antibiotics attack both bad and good bacteria) it might allow the thrush to flourish.  I have to hope and pray that the Fluconazole keeps the yeast under control.  At least I have an extended prescription of the Fluconazole, to continue to take while my good bacteria count increase after I finish the antibiotics.

Breastfeeding your child past infancy is NORMAL

An excerpt from www.kellymom.com:

• The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that "Breastfeeding should be continued for at least the first year of life and beyond for as long as mutually desired by mother and child... Increased duration of breastfeeding confers significant health and developmental benefits for the child and the mother... There is no upper limit to the duration of breastfeeding and no evidence of psychologic or developmental harm from breastfeeding into the third year of life or longer." (AAP 2005)

• The American Academy of Family Physicians recommends that breastfeeding continue throughout the first year of life and that "As recommended by the WHO, breastfeeding should ideally continue beyond infancy, but this is not the cultural norm in the United States and requires ongoing support and encouragement. It has been estimated that a natural weaning age for humans is between two and seven years. Family physicians should be knowledgeable regarding the ongoing benefits to the child of extended breastfeeding, including continued immune protection, better social adjustment, and having a sustainable food source in times of emergency. The longer women breastfeed, the greater the decrease in their risk of breast cancer." They also note that "If the child is younger than two years of age, the child is at increased risk of illness if weaned." (AAFP 2008)

• A US Surgeon General has stated that it is a lucky baby who continues to nurse until age two. (Novello 1990)

• The World Health Organization emphasizes the importance of nursing up to two years of age or beyond (WHO 1993, WHO 2002).

• Scientific research by Katherine A. Dettwyler, PhD shows that 2.5 to 7.0 years of nursing is what our children have been designed to expect (Dettwyler 1995).

References [see also position statements supporting breastfeeding]

Milk vs. Formula...under the microscope

A post from kellymom.com:

September 8, 2011. 

We just got a digital camera attachment for our microscope, so what do you think I photographed first?
All three photos were taken with the exact same magnification, lighting, and all other microscope/camera settings. The color shows more detail than black & white, so I left it alone (even though all the colors may seem unusual coming from three white drops of milk).

What are the Booby-Traps?

An Article By Danielle Rigg, JD, CLC and Bettina Forbes, CLC

Want to know the ”Inconvenient Truth” about breastfeeding?  Here it is:

Women are being pressured to breastfeed but set up to fail! 

Most moms are not making it past the first few weeks of breastfeeding because they are being sabotaged daily by cultural and institutional barriers — or as we call them, the “booby traps!”   Think about it.  Why, all of a sudden, for the first time in millenia, do women fear that they are not capable of producing enough milk for their babes?   Why do we hear so many stories of women who “couldn’t” breastfeed, or that it was hard, or painful?   Why are so few women making it to the recommended goals?   Have our breasts mutated?  Have our babies mutated?   Of course not!

FACT:   Moms are  being booby-trapped! Here is a snapshot of  how women are experiencing the booby traps–please note, this is just a snapshot, it doesn’t cover ALL the booby traps that keep moms from succeeding, and there may be some moms for whom only some of it rings true.   There are many, many wonderful professionals and institutions that are helping moms with herculean efforts. But just to put yourselves into the shoes of what currently constitutes the majority of moms planning to breastfeed, pretend it’s you – sadly, it has already happened to many of you:

Your mother (or step-mother, or mother-in-law, or mentor), didn’t breastfeed, so she can’t show you how, share her experience, or tell you what to expect.  Not so with burping and diapers.  At worst, our mothers may be uncomfortable with breastfeeding, have unresolved feelings of guilt or anger,  be prey to myths and misinformation, and intentionally or unintentionally undermine us.   While we understand that the previous generation didn’t know better, like seatbelts and sunscreen, it is a tough issue to deal with when we are at our most vulnerable as new mothers.  At best, our mothers want to support us, but don’t know how. - Cultural Booby Trap!

You’ve taken a childbirth preparation class, and think you are ready, but breastfeeding  got only an hour tacked on at the end, or you took a hospital breastfeeding class but, that unbeknownst to you,  included myths and misinformation and was given at a hospital that does not have a good track record for breastfeeding continuation (ask how many moms leave the hospital exclusively breastfeeding if you really want to know how committed they are). –  Institutional Booby Trap!

Most of your friends didn’t breastfeed, or maybe you are the first in your group to have a baby, so you have no peer group to turn to for support, questions and inspiration.   If your friends did breastfeed, they had an unnecessarily difficult time because of all the barriers, so they tell you horror stories that scare you, without digging into the root causes of their suffering, or they disapprove if you breastfeed in public. - Cultural Booby Trap!

Your friend shares stories with you of being judged, berated or guilted for giving their babies formula by breastfeeding militants (strangers, angry advocates, and even some health professionals!).   - Cultural Booby Trap!

Your ob/gyn hardly speaks to you about feeding choices, because (s)he is short on time with increasing demands as a primary care physician, increasing pressure of lawsuits and managed care red tape, and is not supported with training by the professional association.  Or, (s)he is too short on time to deal with this post-birth issue and expects the pediatrician to fill in the gap, even though by the time the mother sees the pediatrician, too much time has gone by, and breastfeeding problems may already have set in.  Or (s)he is tired of enouraging mothers to breastfeed only to see them quit under family and peer pressure, or to see them be undermined by poor hospital policies. - Institutional Booby Trap!

You give birth in a hospital that is likely to have astronomically high caesarean and birth intervention rates, which negatively impact breastfeeding.   While breastfeeding after caesarean is still completely possible, your hospital is not practicing protocol to support it. - Institutional Booby Trap!
There is no international board certified lactation consultant on staff at the hospital where you give birth, or she doesn’t make it to your room, despite your many requests, until the last second, if at all, because she is part-time, or is too overwhelmed with patients (the lactation department is not high on the hospital’s priority list and is understaffed).  Or, she is burnt out from a stressful, low-paying job and has a lousy bedside manner, turning you off to breastfeeding.  Or, if you are unlucky enough to deliver on a Friday, you may be discharged without seeing her at all before she comes back on Monday morning.   - Institutional Booby Trap!

Your healthy, full-term baby is supplemented in the hospital with formula, quite possibly against your express wishes, whether or not there is any medical indication.   This happens in 25% of hospitals and is one of the reasons the CDC determined that the average score of hospitals on breastfeeding support is a D.   Yes, a D!  Imagine if that was the score for how hospitals handle heart attacks, or breast cancer!  - Instititutional and Cultural Booby Trap!

You are discharged from the hospital before your milk comes in and before you have gotten the hang of it (2 days  for a vaginal delivery without complications; mature milk usually begins to appear between day 2 and 5), and health insurance won’t cover a longer stay.   Your new mother  “gift”  at 70% of hospitals is a diaper bag filled with formula samples which has been shown to undermine your confidence as a breastfeeding mother and reduce the length of time you are likely to breastfeed. – Institutional and Cultural Booby Trap!

Because your baby was given a bottle in the hospital without needing one, he/she has now has a  poor latch:  breastfeeding becomes unnecessarily painful, your breasts are swollen (engorged) because your baby can’t get latched deep enough to drink the milk as often as (s)he should,  and you have to track down a lactation consultant who makes home visits only to find out that there is little or no insurance coverage for lactation counseling, even though breastfeeding saves insurance companies money. - Institutional Booby Trap!

The clock is ticking and your husband or partner hates to see you suffer and struggle, so he tells you ”it’s okay to give the baby formula, I wasn’t breastfed and I turned out fine,” instead of helping you get expert help to fix the problem.   He means well, but he doesn’t know any better either.  You go online and don’t realize you are swimming in a sea of misinformation–even from well-respected, popular parenting sites.  You go to a breastfeeding website, and it is either totally unappealing, or the language is so technically scientific, it’s over your head.- Cultural Booby Trap!

Miraculously, you get help, stick it out, go to great lengths to leave the room every time you nurse the baby, yet your mother-in-law and friends are uncomfortable with breastfeeding, so they ask you “when are you going to give that baby a bottle,” or make comments to your husband that perpetuate myths and misinformation. - Cultural Booby Trap!

Your pediatrician charts your baby’s weight against formula-fed babies and thinks she/he is undernourished, undermining your confidence and self-esteem.   Compared against breastfed babies, your baby is healthy and thriving, but your pediatrician doesn’t know that breastfed babies have different growth patterns so he recommends you supplement with formula. – Institutional and Cultural Booby Trap!

You ask your pediatrician a question about breastfeeding, but since only more recent medical school graduates are required to learn about human lactation, (s)he can not answer your questions.   Your pediatrician may have their own unrecognized cultural bias against breastfeeding.   Most likely, (s)he has no IBCLC on staff, and/or is not required to refer you to someone for your breastfeeding questions. – Institutional Booby Trap!

If you are lucky to have a maternity leave, or are able to afford unpaid leave, you may feel, as Michelle Obama reportedly did, that you have to go back to work just as you have gotten the hang of breastfeeding.   Perhaps you won’t be able to negotiate a flexible work schedule, as she did. - Institutional and Cultural Booby Trap!

Most likely, especially if you are a blue-collar worker, you will have to fight your employer for pumping breaks, and put up with snickers and sneers from co-workers.   Your colleagues who smoke get a fancy lounge with a t.v., but you’ll have to find an empty broom closet or bathroom with an outlet.   You have no protection from discrimination or being fired for being a nursing mom (pregnant moms are protected, but not nursing moms). - Institutional and Cultural Booby Trap!

If you are a stay-at-home mom, you will be expected to STAY AT HOME, and not feed your baby while you are running errands, or taking the older sibling to a soccer game, or going to the PTO;  you will face social disapproval, rude stares, and risk getting kicked out of stores, airplanes, restaurants and the mall.     You will need to have the same endurance and perseverance as an athelete trying to run a race in flip-flops while being jeered at from the crowd. - Cultural Booby Traps!

Anywhere along this road, that free sample of formula starts to look quite appealing, and maybe some of the sneakiest formula advertising and marketing messages have worked their way into your subliminal consciousness; the smiling babies, the misleading claims, the false portrayal of health and vitality even though your rational mind, and health professionals and experts all over the world know very well that formula-fed babies, and their moms, are actually at greater risk for a host of complications, disease and infection. - Cultural & Institutional Booby Trap!

If you can’t breastfeed, or throw in the towel, which most new moms understandably do (the 77% who start in the hospital, have fallen to around 30% breastfeeding exclusively by around three weeks),  you will experience social disapproval, judgment, and pressure for NOT breastfeeding, leaving you to feel that you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t. - Cultural Booby Trap!

Pretty grim, huh?  We wish this were a made-up story, but as many of you already know, this is the plain truth for the majority of moms planning to breastfeed.   And there are many, many more Booby Traps than the ones we listed here–Booby Traps like poorly performed breast reduction surgeries, for example.  But a gauntlet of Booby Traps is not the way breastfeeding was meant to be – it is a formula for unnecessary problems and failures.  Breastfeeding was meant to be nourishing for you and baby, pleasurable and uniquely fulfilling, albeit with a learning curve to increase bonding and cement healthy development.

If this is your story, the struggle and suffering you experienced while trying to breastfeed with so many obstacles in your way and so little support may have resulted in feelings of guilt, grief and self-blame.  We want you to know that we understand and that it’s not your fault!  You didn’t fail, the system failed you! Most of you could have succeeded if it weren’t for the Booby Traps!   Best for Babes is offering you a unique opportunity to turn your negative experience into a positive — for yourself and for other women.  It’s time to beat the Booby Traps  and stop beating up each other!  Let’s put the pressure where it belongs:  on the barriers that stand in our way, and not on each other.  Help us help other moms avoid the same pitfalls you encountered.  Join our cause to  BEAT The Booby Traps! You, us, our babies, humankind, the planet – we all deserve better!

To find out how to avoid the Booby Traps, and enjoy breastfeeding from the start, read  Prepare:  How to Overcome the Booby Traps,  and see our Checklist.   You will also want to read our sections, the Learning Curve, and Get Your Best Game on Girlfriend.
 
©2009 www.bestforbabes.org.  All Rights Reserved.

Interview Freeze

This morning I had a job interview.  I totally froze once the questions started coming, getting more complex along the way.  There were things I should have been able to rhyme off and POOF, my mind was blank.  There was geological information I should know, but didn't; or at least wasn't confident in what I thought I knew.  The practical portion of the interview was a 1-hour research exercise, exactly what I figured it would be...and I have no idea how I did at it; certainly 1 hour is not nearly enough time to do thorough research; but the entry template was awful (unclear, disorderly and in desperate need of formatting - it was a real distraction for me!)

Oh, how upsetting to want this position so much and know how well I could do at the job, but feel like I failed to market myself adequately for the position.  I also learned the identity of two of the other candidates and one is definitely strong competition (the other just wants interview experience; doesn't really want the job - from what I heard).

I have to stop thinking like this.  What's done is done.  I have to lay my burden at the feet of Jesus and trust that if I am meant to have this position, I will get it; and if not then God has something even better in store for me. (But it is so hard not to feel like a failure these days: in the job market, as a mother who can't physically care for her child and even as a wife). 

God comfort me!